Thursday, March 12, 2009

the space between

The third week of the chemo cycle is the best, and I am noticing that this "third week" is better than the ones before. Just a few twinges of chest pain here and there, but overall I feel almost normal. As I've come out the fog this time around, I've noticed a couple of things. First, I am really aware of the wear and tear on the family. Accommodating me and taking care of me has been an added stress that is taking its toll on both Casey and the kids. They do so much to take up the slack when I don't feel good and they don't complain. Needless to say, we are all looking forward to getting out of town this weekend. I'll leave them with Casey's parents midweek to come back for chemo, and I am really glad for Casey and the kids that they will have a little break from the chemo "drill" this time.

Finally, I continue to learn from many of you what love looks like. Our small group recently did a parenting study in which the author, Dr. Tim Kimmel, defines love as "the commitment of my will to your best interests, regardless of the cost." It is in this season, after the initial surge of shock and attention has passed when I am really amazed to see people doing this to us - continuing to pray for us, spending their time and energy on our behalf. We have received yard work and meals and financial assistance and childcare and prayers and words of encouragement. Friends continue to do life with us, even when we are a mess, and love us so extravagently that they are sending Casey and I on a weekend getaway in a few weeks. It is definitely extrememly humbling and sustaining at the same time...

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